6 Tips to Get You Out of Your Rut and Energize Your Career MoJo for 2016

Welcome to my three part Busting Holiday Stress for Busy People blog series!  Today brings part one of a topic that I find is super important to focus on as the holiday season approaches: setting boundaries, taking care of yourself, and remembering what the holidays mean to you without losing your mind.  Sound like a tall order? Ha! Maybe.  But I’m here to help you get through it. . . while not feeling like you are completely out of control.

Today’s blog post topic is how to revitalize your career for the new year.  Next week I’ll help you prepare for the upcoming Thanksgiving break from work — how are you going to get it all done before leaving for the holiday break??  And finally, I’ll guide you in how to cope with all of the snacks and sweets that your coworkers bring in to the office during this time.  No, you don’t have to avoid the staff kitchen for the next two months!

Read on for Post #1 and keep your eyes open next Tuesday for the next installment. . .

 

6 Tips to Get You Out of Your Rut and Energize Your Career MoJo for 2016

 

1.) Forget everything about the “how” you do things (marketing, to-do’s, goals, etc),

and reconnect with the WHY you do what you do.

Reflect back on that moment where you knew which career was for you. How does that speak to you now?

 

2.) Look at the relationships in your life: with food, with sleep, with your partner, with your family, with work, with YOURSELF. Make a list of how you would like to find more balance and meaning in these areas – where you are feeling fulfilled and where you feel something is missing.

 

3.) Shred your to-do list into a thousand tiny pieces. Practice mindfulness by doing a body scan and reconnect with the place in your body that holds the WHY to your career – the meaning of it all. Start a new to-do list from that place.

 

4.) Ask your best friend/mentor/partner to tell you the 5 things they see as your strengths in your career and the 5 places where you could grow. Use these as templates for goal-setting in 2016.

 

5.) Envision your self and your business at the END of 2016. How do you want to feel/think about those things?   What would you like to be able to say about yourself in 2016? Journal about this for 15 minutes.

 

6.) Make a list of 100 Pieces of Gratitude. Write the numbers 1-100 on a piece of paper. Begin writing a list of things you have been grateful for in 2015. They don’t have to be complete sentences and it’s okay if there is some repetition (this actually is part of the process). When you are done, read the list. Gratitude is a gift that begs to be shared and can help us reconnect with our values, or passion, and (re)ignite our fire.

 

Want to download your own free copy of this list to share around?  Find it here.

What else would you add to this list to rejuvenate your career mojo? Leave a comment below!


‘But It Feels So Safe Here!’ — Four Fears That Keep Us Stuck In Our Comfort Zones (And How To Get Out)

“The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It’s our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows.” 
― Brené Brown

Do you know that feeling of putting on your pajamas or your favorite sweats, snuggling up to your most loved movie, and feeling so safe and content?  Doesn’t it feel great?  We all crave that sense of safety in our lives and feeling that place of contentment gives us a sense of security, coziness and comfort despite the stressors that we face each day.

But what if we get stuck there? What if it’s not serving us to stay there?

I’ve recently been reflecting on this concept of a “comfort zone” and how, while it feels so nice and non-threatening to be there, staying there can actually keep us away from what we’re really needing and yearning for.

In my work with clients, I believe one of my greatest strengths is empathy, active listening, and being present.  I could empathize all day long with my clients’ struggles.

However, if I don’t help push them forward, if I don’t challenge them to embrace vulnerability and connect with their greatest self, they stay stuck.  They may find themselves lost in that messiness that is a part of life, that “mud” which is perhaps comfortable but not helping them connect to that inner warrior  who wants to fight for true inner peace.

So, what keeps us stuck in our comfort zones, and how can we push past them to realize our true potential?

1.) Fear of the unknown.  I think we can all relate to this fear — “if I change, how will I know what it’s like?  What if I can’t predict what will happen?”.  This is very common, and yet change is happening all of the time.  We have a choice to embrace it or to resist it.  In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy a common mantra is “embrace your demons and follow your heart”, meaning can you allow yourself to feel your emotions and fears, to not resist them, and to follow what your heart truly desires?  I feel that if we are willing to take that leap we can learn that we have more resiliency than we may think and that we can cope with just about any change that can happen.  And who knows, that change may be the thing we really needed to feel more connected to ourselves!

2.)  Fear of failure.  Oh boy, this is a biggie.  So much of the time we resist change or trying something new because we are afraid of failing at it.  Have you been there?  I have.  Why are we so terrified of failing?  We cannot succeed all of the time, nor is it even healthy.  Failing at something helps us learn more about ourselves and embrace that life is full of ups and downs.  Pushing out of our comfort zones may mean “failing”, but there is always another chance to try again or to try it a different way.  By failing we learn what actually works.

3.) Fear of rejection.  I feel this is closely connected to #1 and #2.  One of our greatest fears is to be rejected, as that could trigger feelings of shame or being unworthy of love, belonging, connection.  Researcher Dr. Brene Brown so eloquently states: “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”  By allowing ourselves to be vulnerable — to take that step outside of our comfort zone — we can deepen and nurture our sense of worth.

4.) Fear of success and progress.  Yes, I know that might sound strange and counter-intuitive.  However, if we can’t really predict what it feels like to change and to push out of our comfort zones, sometimes it can feel overwhelming to actually get to where we want to be.  Have you ever made a big change in your life, one that you feel is a positive one, and yet still have trouble embracing or owning it?  For example, many people who are working on recovery from an eating disorder may truly, desperately want to get out of the struggle with the disorder.  However, letting go of it (making “progress”) might mean giving up something that has comforted them for so long and being vulnerable or “naked” without it can actually be quite terrifying.  Helping ourselves see that “Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging.” (Brené Brown) can give ourselves the grace to be our authentic selves.

 

Whew, I notice quite a few “fears” listed here.  It’s interesting how fear can keep us so stuck, so disconnected from our values and what really matters to us, and allow us to stay in our comfort zones — places that don’t always serve us in a meaningful way.

Where are you stuck in your comfort zone?  What is one step you can take to push out of it, embrace vulnerability, and be willing to accept whatever comes next?


Your Personal Bill of Rights!

PERSONAL BILL OF RIGHTS

  

  1. I have a right to ask for what I want.
  2. I have a right to say no to requests or demands that I cannot meet.
  3. I have a right to express all of my feelings – positive and negative.
  4. I have a right to change my mind.
  5. I have a right to make mistakes and do not have to be perfect.
  6. I have a right to follow my own values and beliefs.
  7. I have the right to say no to anything if I feel that I am not ready, if it is unsafe, or if it conflicts with my values.
  8. I have the right to determine my own priorities.
  9. I have the right not to be responsible for the actions, feelings, or behavior of others.
  10. I have the right to expect honesty from others.
  11. I have the right to be angry at someone I love.
  12. I have the right to be myself. To be unique.
  13. I have the right to express fear.
  14. I have the right to say, “I don’t know”.
  15. I have the right not to give excuses or reasons for my behavior.
  16. I have the right to make decisions based on my feelings.
  17. I have the right to my own personal space and time.
  18. I have the right to be playful.
  19. I have the right to be healthier than those around me.
  20. I have the right to feel safe, and be in a non-abusive environment.
  21. I have the right to make friends and be comfortable around people.
  22. I have the right to change and grow.
  23. I have the right to have my wants and needs respected by others.
  24. I have the right to be treated with dignity and respect.
  25. I have the right to be happy.

 

Remind yourself of these rights daily! It might be helpful to print a copy and post it where you can see it every day.