Don’t Let an Eating Disorder Go Unnoticed: Understanding the Signs and Symptoms

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Eating disorders can be a difficult topic to talk about, but it’s important to shed light on the subject as early detection and intervention can significantly increase the chance of recovery. If you suspect someone you know might be struggling with an eating disorder, there are some warning signs to look out for.

Now, this isn’t meant to be a definitive checklist as every eating disorder is unique and people may not show all the symptoms at once. However, it does provide a general overview of the types of behaviors and attitudes that may indicate a problem.

Firstly, watch out for emotional and behavioral changes: 

  • If someone is preoccupied with weight, food, calories, carbohydrates, fat grams, and dieting, and is constantly talking about them
  • Refusing to eat certain foods or restricting entire categories of food 
  • Food rituals such as eating only particular foods or food groups excessive chewing, or not allowing foods to touch
  • Skipping meals or taking small portions of food at regular meals
  • Withdrawing from usual friends and activities
  • Extreme concern with body size and shape

Some of these behaviors might be mild and not very concerning, but when behaviors like these begin to impact your quality of life or your loved one’s quality of life and impact your/their ability to do things, that is a time to reach out for support. 

Another area to keep an eye on is physical symptoms. People with eating disorders may experience: 

  • Noticeable fluctuations in weight, both up and down
  • They may complain of stomach cramps, constipation, acid reflux, or experience menstrual irregularities
  • They may also have difficulties concentrating, and abnormal laboratory findings such as anemia, low thyroid and hormone levels, low potassium, and low white and red blood cell counts 
  • Watch for dizziness, fainting, and feeling cold all the time
  • Sleep problems
  • Cuts and calluses across the top of finger joints (a result of inducing vomiting),
  • Dental problems such as enamel erosion, cavities, discoloration of teeth from vomiting, and tooth sensitivity
  • Dry skin and hair, brittle nails, or muscle weakness
  • Poor wound healing, and impaired immune functioning

Remember, early intervention is key to recovery, and seeking help from a medical professional or a certified eating disorder professional (CEDS) can make a huge difference in the outcome. They can support you or your loved one, seek help and offer guidance throughout the journey to recovery.

Below are some additional resources!

  1. Eating Disorder Foundation (EDF)
  2. The National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA)
  3. National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders (ANAD)
  4. Eating Disorder Care

Be Your Own Valentine: Self-Care is True Love

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Valentine’s Day can be a day filled with excitement, happiness, and love. But it can also be a day filled with pressure, high expectations, grief and/or loneliness. We all have different experiences when it comes to Valentine’s Day, and while some people feel joyful, connected, and fulfilled, others may find themselves feeling lonely, isolated or unsupported. Whatever your situation, it is important to remember that self-care is true love. 

Self-care is a practice that involves taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. It’s about treating yourself with kindness, respect, and compassion. It’s about recognizing your worth, accepting your flaws, and embracing your uniqueness. Easier said than done, I know. But, when you care for yourself, you are more available to care for others. 

Taking the time to nourish your body, mind, and soul can feel like a tall order. But it can be done through a variety of activities like: movement, sleeping-in, ordering take out, positive affirmations, reading, spending time in nature, leaving work early, or taking a relaxing bath. Self-care helps you to recharge and replenish your energy, which, in turn, makes you feel better and more equipped to handle life’s challenges.

Being your own Valentine means making a conscious effort to put yourself first. It means treating yourself with the same love and care that you would give to someone you care about deeply. It means taking the time to understand your needs, setting boundaries, and making yourself a priority. When you prioritize your self-care and self-love, you will find that you are able to be more resilient, confident, and fulfilled in all areas of your life.

So, this Valentine’s Day, why not be your own Valentine and treat yourself with kindness, respect, and love? Do something special for yourself, something that makes you feel good and brings you joy. Whether it’s cooking your favorite meal, taking a yoga class, or eating your favorite chocolate, take the time to focus on yourself and your well-being.

Self-care is essential to our well-being. Be your own Valentine, make sure to show yourself some love this Valentine’s Day.

New Year, Same You! Rejecting Diet Culture’s Obsession with Resolutions

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As we welcome in the new year, it’s natural to reflect on the past and consider ways we can improve ourselves in the future. What isn’t natural is diet culture’s intense obsession with you becoming an all “new you!” As if you are an appliance, not a living, breathing, human being! 

The diet/wellness world takes advantage of the natural new start to ram some disordered ideas down your throat. The New Year’s Resolution train is a large binge/restrict cycle we all go through one a year and it is toxic! You are encouraged to binge through the holidays because the looming “resolutions” will restart the clock and you’ll cleanse all your “past sins” with your new habits. 

This promotes not only an unhealthy relationship with food, exercise, and goal setting, but promotes the narrative that in order to live the life you want you to need to change all of you. It’s so much pressure and filled with so much inferiority rhetoric. 

Again, I am all for personal growth, self-reflection, trying new things and setting goals to get there, but it doesn’t have to come with the all-or-nothing, black and white, thinking of the New Year’s Resolution world. Change can happen any day of the year, and you don’t need a “new you” in order to live a life that feels good to you. 

Instead of stressing out about large goals and drastic “lifestyle” changes, why not try being kind to yourself, giving yourself permission to fail – failing is a crucial part of learning –  and remember that change is a process, not a destination. It can be messy and uncomfortable, there will be setbacks, but when you see every day, every hour, every moment as a chance to begin again, you can be present with your growth. 

Instead of becoming a “new you,” maybe we should focus on being more loving and accepting of ourselves as we grow, change or maybe stay the same. All options are ok. 

As we enter the new year, remember to be kind to yourself and embrace who you are. You are enough, and you have the power to make positive changes in your life every day, not just on January 1st.

So here’s to a happy and fulfilling new year, filled with self-love and acceptance. 

7 Tips to Support Recovery During the Holiday Season

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The holidays are touted to be “the most wonderful time of the year,” but for people in recovery, it can feel like the most stressful time of the year because the holidays can present many challenges to recovery. Holidays mean irregular schedules which can derail useful routines and practices people have to support their recovery. Holidays mean lots of food and usually lots of diet talk coupled with New Year Resolution promises. Holidays mean interacting with family, which can be supportive, but sometimes family can present tricky dynamics. All of this and the forced joyfulness of the season can be incredibly stressful for anyone, but especially those with eating disorders or mood disorders. So, here are some tips to support yourself during this holiday season.

1. Connect With Your Care Team

As we head into the holiday season, be sure to connect with the professionals that support you with recovery – a therapist, dietician, trainer, and any other professional support. Discuss potential “triggers,” anxieties, and any “fear foods” that you might be encountering. Brainstorm strategies to support yourself through any challenging situation you might predict.

2. Sculpt Your Schedule

Look ahead and create a schedule that provides enough “down time” and/or normal routines as possible. You may not be able to control other people or the food they bring, but you can control how many festivities you attend, how long you stay, and how much additional activities you’re willing to take on. You CAN also schedule self-care time and treat it just like you would an important meeting. It is non-negotiable. Your self-care is important.

3. Fire Up Your Friends and Family

Make a list of friends and family members who are supportive and helpful when challenges arise: people who can add connection and compassion as your ED demands isolation and black and white thinking. Reach out to these people beforehand and talk about ways they can support you through the season.

4. Hone Your Healthy Boundaries

You know what situations, topics and people who provide the most challenge for you. You might ask your family and friends to avoid diet talk or negative body talk while they’re around you. You might limit your interactions with certain stressors or time spent at certain holiday events. Remember, boundaries are a way to love yourself and others at the same time. They are not barriers to love, but instructions on how people can love you best. You are allowed to set healthy boundaries!

5. Step Up Self-Care Practices

Know that you might need more care. Holidays are hard and no matter how much you prepare unexpected things might arise and make them harder. Allowing yourself time in a safe environment, doing something that replenishes you is vital.

6. Charge Up Your Compassion

Have compassion for yourself. Recovery is hard. Holidays are hard. Unlearning diet culture is hard. It takes time and you won’t do everything perfectly and you’re not supposed to. Not being perfect is deeply human. Find ways to add compassion to your day with self-talk or writing down compassionate affirmations. Whatever way feels most supportive.

7. Shift the Focus

You also get to enjoy the holiday season! So, be mindful and present. Connect with family, friends and traditions you love. Eat food you enjoy! Play music that connects with your soul! Maybe start a practice of gratitude (if you don’t have one already) to really reinforce the moment. It will never be the holiday season in 2022 again, so savor the fun and happy parts. Record them. Remember them. You deserve happiness too!

Bootstrapping Your Way to Thinness: Dieting and the American Dream

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What is “bootstrapping?”

Most of us are familiar with the phrase “pull yourself up from your bootstraps”, it’s as American as apple pie. Bootstrapping is the idea that anyone can change their situation using only existing resources if they work hard enough. It is the core idea behind The American Dream, which of course is falsely predicated on the idea that all people have equal access to all opportunities. We know that isn’t true and hasn’t been true throughout the history of America, yet the lore of The American Dream persists. 

Why? Because it gives us a sense of control. It soothes us to know that we have complete and total power over our destiny. If you succeed it’s because you worked really hard, and you have great “willpower”, but if you fail it’s because you didn’t work hard enough. This black-and-white thinking allows us to make sense of things, unlike the truth which is that our destinies are intricately linked to the systems and people around us. This is a nuanced conversation with a lot more unknowns than we are comfortable with.

Bootstrapping and Diet & Wellness World

Bootstrapping is also the core idea of diet & wellness culture and the primary marketing tactic of the diet & wellness industry. They sell us the belief that anyone can change their body size using only a diet/lifestyle change and hard work (willpower). If your body size doesn’t change or you gain the weight back, you are the problem. Failure is never because of the diet/lifestyle change, but because of the individual. You didn’t have the “right” diet or you weren’t following the diet the “right” way. The diet is never to blame when studies consistently show that 95-98% of diets fail long term. This shame-filled narrative is still pervasive and persuasive. 

Why? Because it gives us a sense of control. It soothes us to know that we have complete and total power over our body size and therefore our status in society. It gives us the illusion that anyone can move freely out of the societal structure of oppression based on our bodies if they “work hard enough” instead of working to dismantle the oppressive structure in the first place. 

Most people don’t want to be fat because they know how fat people are treated in our society and are incredibly afraid of being treated that way. And yet, instead of having an enlightened conversation about body diversity, poverty, food deserts, racial disparities in health care, or other multifaceted reasons people might be fat, we want to blame the individual because American culture has trained us to individualize systemic issues. It is easier to blame a person and say they need to change instead of a system or societal belief because changing systems and societal beliefs requires collective action. This speaks to internalized weight bias that pervades our culture and causes us to pit people against one another.

There is no simple solution or black-and-white answer when it comes to why we have diverse body sizes. Being fat isn’t a moral failing and being thin isn’t salvation. We collectively need to work together to dismantle the idea that anyone can become thin if they work hard enough. It isn’t a matter of work ethic. Also, some people are fat and will stay fat and they deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. 

Bootstrapping and Recovery

This “bootstrap” logic can also show up when you’re in recovery. People can feel they aren’t “working hard enough” at their recovery or that if they relapse it’s because they didn’t “have the willpower to recover”. This personalization is toxic and counterproductive. Unlearning disordered eating is full of habit and behavior disruption, which is hard for everyone!

What you can do?

When you notice or hear the “bootstrap argument” see if you can add nuance and compassion to the conversation. Ask yourself questions like:

  •  “Who benefits from me feeling this is my problem and my problem alone?” 
  • “Who else do I know who has also had this struggle?” 
  • “Where did the system fail me?”
  • “How is my belief about ____ influenced by cultural messaging?”
  • “How do I feel about myself after using bootstrapping logic? Is that feeling helpful”

Incorporating the collective normalizes a situation as a systems issue. If you aren’t alone and most people also struggle with something then it’s time to widen the lens. Also, think about how “bootstrapping” makes you feel, even if it were your fault (which it’s not), is it useful to make yourself feel like garbage because of it? You deserve better and we deserve better. 

Meeting You Where You Are: Health At Every Size Personal Training

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I am Abigail Ladd, an anti-diet health coach, and Health at Every Size fitness professional. I have worked in the fitness industry for 15 years training people of all ages in multiple modalities. However, it was only in the last 5 years I walked away from the traditional “health & fitness” model towards the anti-diet and Health at Every Size frameworks driven by my own recovery from an eating disorder. This shift not only improved my relationship with my food and my body, but it has also made me a better trainer and coach to my clients and truly support them wherever they are with their fitness goals. 

While you may have heard of Health at Every Size or HAES, you might not fully understand what it is. So, let’s define it right out of the gates: 

Health at Every Size is a set of principles that was established in 2003 by the Association of Size Diversity and Health (ASDAH). These principles reject the idea that weight, body size and BMI are sole indicators of a healthy body. Instead, they are merely data points in a complex, nuanced system. We cannot determine someone’s health based on the size of their body. HAES also rejects the idea that weight loss is the panacea of the diet industry and some parts of the medical community claim it is, because people of all sizes experience varying levels of health – not just throughout the world, but also throughout their lifetime. Health isn’t a stagnant thing. After all, every time you get a cold or the flu, your health status has changed. 

As a personal trainer, I have had lots of conversations about Health at Every Size with colleagues in the industry because HAES brings out all the feels on either side of the discussion.

Critics of HAES describe it as “endorsing or glorifying obesity” and “giving up on your health.” First, the portrayals of fat or “obese” people in our media are far from “endorsing and glorifying”, in fact they are full of shame, collective disgust and often verbal abuse of fat people. Fat people are treated terribly and we all know it, which is one of the many reasons people are so afraid to become fat. There is not a multi-billion dollar industry promoting being fat, but there is a multi-billion dollar industry glorifying thinness and disordered eating. So, if we as a society want to be worried about glorifying a body type with unhealthy eating behaviors, we should all have our eyes trained on Diet Culture.

Second, health is not synonymous with thinness. We all know people who are thin, who manage health conditions and we all know people who are fat and manage no health conditions…and vice versa. More to the point though, health isn’t a moral imperative or something you “owe” anyone. Your health status is no one’s business but your own. Additionally, weight loss does not automatically correlate with improved health outcomes. But, health behaviors like stress management, eating nutritious food, and exercise, do correlate with improved health regardless of any change in weight. 

So, putting weight at the forefront isn’t “health promoting” because it is the wrong focus. 

Usually the main reason someone wants to hire a personal trainer and health coach is weight loss. Now, this can be coded in many ways: be healthy, have more energy, feel confident, be stronger, play with my kids more. However, when setting goals with my clients I ask: “If I help you be healthy, have more energy, feel confident, be stronger, play with your kids more, but your body size doesn’t change, will you be ok with that?” most of my clients say “no,” because what they really want is weight loss. They want to look the part. Now, there are many reasons people believe a thinner body will give them health, confidence, energy, strength and make them a better partner, parent or family member, but all of that is marketing. Thinness doesn’t mean you’ll get any of that and, more often than not, the behaviors required to make someone thinner than their natural frame – extreme food restriction, exercise routines and/or constant weight fluctuations are incredibly damaging to one’s health. 

We don’t know if a person’s body size will change as a result of adding in health behaviors. If we did, no one would have to try oodles of diets. They’d only need one. Bodies are diverse and nuanced. But we do know how to build a person’s strength, manage and increase their energy, build confidence, and increase your endurance so you can play with your kids for longer periods of time.

So, with Health at Every Sizes personal training, we do not pursue weight loss and  it’s not “on the back burner” because it’s not a reliable data point to set a goal. Your body might change in size and it might not. However, we can improve your strength, endurance, mobility, stability and your relationship with food. A Health at Every Size approach means we’re not trying to “fix” your body we’re working on the best way to support your body sustainably, so you can support it and yourself as your body changes throughout your life. 

When people think their bodies aren’t valuable as they are, regardless of size, they treat them terribly with crash diets and over exercising. But, when we acknowledge that bodies are inherently worthy and valuable, it is a lot easier for people to care for their bodies because they know how precious they are.

To find out more about my fitness services check out: https://www.abigailladdcoach.com/

Breaking the Feeding Cycle: How to teach your children to eat intuitively

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 “Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”

James Baldwin

Our children hear how we talk about bodies and watch how we treat our bodies, including feeding them. They listen and learn how to categorize “good’ and “bad” food. Whether you have children, work with children or just spend time around children in your family, they are downloading the world through the actions and words of adults. We all have power to break the cycle of disordered eating, to stop generational feeding trauma with every interaction with the young people in our lives. 

I know this can seem like a VERY daunting task, especially if you are in recovery yourself and relearning supportive eating practices. It’s ok. That’s why I wrote this blog! 

Let’s talk about how to help children develop intuitive eating: 

1.) Eat together. Think out loud. 

Children learn by observing adults. They are masters at intuiting meaning and subtlety. So, eating with your child is a powerful way to impact their eating habits. Ask them questions about their food, demonstrate mindful eating techniques like taking time to smell your food and discuss the taste. Food is love in our culture, so take time to love them while they eat and encourage them to love sharing and eating with others. 

2.) You provide the structure. They provide the choice.

Children are still learning how to eat to feel good in their bodies. They are still learning the difference between “sometimes food” and “everyday food,” so provide mealtime and snacktime structure, but allow them to choose what and how much they eat out of that structure. “Picky eating” is normal child development. Be patient. Be consistent. Create a joyful spirit of trying new things and a safe place to dislike certain foods. 

3.) Trust your child. Provide Language. 

It can be hard to trust your child when they report they are hungry because it could be every 5 minutes. Ask them about their hunger. Provide them language to describe different types of hunger. Help them identify where in their body they feel it. Ask if it is a small, medium or big hunger. This will build their intuitive sense. If mealtime or snack time is close, ask if they can wait. If they’re going to have an activity over their normal snacktime, teach them how to plan for hunger and eat beforehand. Eventually, your child will be uncomfortably full or feel uncomfortable sensations after eating certain foods. Sit with them, comfort them, discuss what could have happened to make them feel this way and how to prepare for next time. Teaching them to trust their body, means you have to trust their body too. 

4.) Focus on strengths. Celebrate change. 

Diet culture is deficit focused. It is all about the things your body isn’t. Flood your child with the pros of having a body, even the mundane! “Your body is so cool, it digests all your food without thinking about it!” or “You’re so strong you can climb all the way up there!” There are endless ways to think about all the amazing things a body does in a day, be explicit. Praise other people for their power, strength, kindness, persistence in front of your children, show them how to lift people up in ways other than body praise. Celebrate change in all things, but especially bodies. Changing bodies are inevitable. Set their expectations, their body will continually change. It is normal, natural, and not something to worry about because your body is not your worth! 

 

None of this is easy, especially while on your own recovery journey. You don’t need to be perfect. You will make mistakes, you will not have the right words, and you may not have time everyday to slow down and be mindful with your kid. That’s ok. That’s life. That’s a great thing to show them too, but when you can, these small moments can be so impactful to cultivating a strong and positive relationship with their body and food. We all can recall powerful moments with our caregivers or teachers that changed our perspectives. You have power to be that for the young people in your life. Your healing will help heal others! 

The Dreaded Doctor: Advocating for Yourself at the Doctor’s Office

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Fat people and/or people recovering from an eating disorder likely have a complicated relationship with medical providers. Most likely, they have experienced weight stigma and fatphobia when engaging in our medical system. Weight stigma research shows that medical providers self-report more bias towards fat people and often prescribe diets or weight loss before testing for maladies. 

Now, while the medical system is changing, it is slow, to say the least. So, in the meantime, I’m here to give you helpful tips on how to speak up for yourself and create meaningful boundaries with your medical provider. 

  • Find a better doctor: 

      1. Know that there are “fat-friendly” or HAES-aligned practitioners out there. If you have the ability to change providers, you should. Change to someone who will give you higher quality, comprehensive care. Thankfully, someone decided to compile a list by state and country: Fat Friendly Doctors List

  • Prepare: 

      1. Speaking up at the moment can be hard. So, call your provider’s office ahead of time. Ask them to make a note on your chart that you don’t want to be weighed (YES, it’s totally ok to refuse. Unless you are rapidly dropping or gaining weight, your weight isn’t a “vital sign”). 
      2. Now, some people on certain medications and/or with certain conditions may need to have their weight more closely monitored. Or perhaps you don’t want to refuse to be weighed, which is totally fine. You can stand with your back to the scale and ask them to not tell you the result. This allows them to take their “vital sign” and doesn’t trigger your eating disorder. 
      3. If applicable, also have them note your eating disorder on your chart. Tell them they may not counsel you on weight loss for any reason. 

  • Activate your care team:

      1. If you work with an ED Recovery Therapist, give your medical provider their contact information. Direct your provider to speak with your therapist about any concerns they might have regarding your weight. (You’ll most likely need to sign a consent form). The same thing goes for anyone working with nutritionists or dietitians during recovery, allow the provider to talk with your “care team” if they have concerns instead of activating your ED.

  • Bring a Buddy: 

    1. If you can, bring someone with you to your appointment. It can be intimidating and isolating to advocate for yourself alone. If you bring a spouse, family member, or friend who can help advocate for you, you might have more success and feel better about the whole situation. 

Most providers make appropriate adjustments when presented with one or all of these solutions. If your provider doesn’t change and continues to have fatphobic interactions with you or is dismissive of your symptoms, find a new provider. It is worth it because you’re worth it. You deserve to have quality health care regardless of your weight or body size. 

Hope Springs Eternal: Use fresh starts to support your recovery

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Phrases like “hope springs eternal,” “while there is life, there is hope,” or “tomorrow is a new day” are staples in our society because it feels humanity has a unique capability to renew their sense of hope. Nature is a constant reminder of ebb and flow, death and birth, light and dark, so we come by this hope renewal naturally. 

Our predilection for “fresh starts” and “new beginnings” is often used by diet culture to reinforce their sales pitch to start a new diet, fast, or exercise program. Anyone who has dieted is familiar with Monday start dates for such things. However, this natural inclination to begin again is very helpful to those of us in recovery or just beginning our recovery. 

Recovery is not linear. Meaning it can be full of fits and starts, loops and spirals, and sometimes it feels like you’re on a treadmill. All of this can be incredibly discouraging, but leveraging our desire for renewal can be very supportive. 

To start, utilize natural “new starts” to your advantage. The 1st of the month, the 1st day of the week, a new season (like the onset of spring) are great places to start hope renewals for recovery. 

For example, you could use a new month to reaffirm goals you’ve set or build in new ones. The beginning of a new week to write new affirmations or start a new self-care practice. The start of a new season is a great time to think about clearing out old things, clothing, habits, and bringing in new things to support the new life you’re cultivating. 

Next, find a way to record/track your progress using renewals. Because recovery can feel like a maze, journaling or note-taking can be helpful to demonstrate our growth. Documenting this process allows you to look back and remind yourself of just how far you’ve come. You can journal at the start of a new day, have a monthly check-in chart for your goals, or use a mood chart or graph your emotions throughout the day or week. Pairing natural new starts with journaling or recording thoughts on your phone is the next step to facilitate recovery. 

Finally, develop a practice of seeing “new starts” everywhere. Every day is a new day, so every day is a good time to start caring for yourself better. Just as every moment is a new moment to nourish yourself fully or remember that thoughts are just thoughts. Every inhale is a new start. You don’t have to wait for a Monday to begin. You don’t have to wait for a moment more. You are capable of taking the next recovery step whenever. Life is now.

Surviving a Perpetual Pandemic

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I don’t know about you, but for me walking into 2022 feels like staring down the barrel of 2020 all over again. Hospitals and schools scrambling to juggle every demand, workplaces switching to remote or bumping back the ever-receding “return date”, isolation, anxiety, unpredictability, zoom fatigue, and stress around every corner. 

So, what do you do? How do you set intentions for a new year while in a marathon of “unprecedented times”? Slowly, mindfully, and with acceptance.

My answer might annoy some people because after two years of being told to be “mindful” by all the corporations in the world so you’ll be more productive and less stressed is incredibly frustrating. I completely understand that annoyance. But this mindful intention is for you, not for your boss or co-workers. You. In a time of such destabilization, grounding ourselves is critical. 

  • Slow down – Slowing down can seem impossible as we whirl from one activity to another or make yet another “pivot” to accommodate the pandemic, but grounding works best when we are intentional with the energy we do have. 
  • Be mindful – The pandemic isn’t going away. The juggle isn’t going away. The best we can do is to control what we can. It is easy to get caught in the churning wheel of anxiety and “what-ifs”. Take time to return to the present and focus on the now. You only have control of the present. Ask yourself: “what can I do to support myself right now, at this moment?”
  • Acceptance – I’m not saying you need to accept that life will be this way forever because that’s just not true. Everything changes and your life will continue to change. But, can you accept your feelings? This is hard. Emotions are a natural part of being human. Can you allow them? Acceptance of our emotions or frustrating circumstances eases the pain of being in them. It also allows us to move through things (or let them move through us) without getting stuck ruminating. This is not easy, but it is worth it. 

These past years have been hard. It’s ok if you’re not ok. Remember you don’t need to set any intentions for the year if you don’t want to. Don’t add more to your to-do list if you don’t have to. At the end of the day, find a way to incorporate more support, predictability, and self-acceptance.